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| Will Text Messaging & Multiple Simultaneous Communications Doom Meaningful Conversation? |
by Keith ReimerAround the same time each month, I begin to get a queasy and nauseous feeling in the pit of my stomach. Is it something I ate? Is it that time of the month? Well, actually, it is! The middle of each month brings me my monthly wireless bill. Enclosed in that envelope (which usually takes me a few days to muster up the courage to open) is the total number of text messages that my twin 13 year old daughters have typed on their cell phone keyboards in the last month. Usually, it averages about 3,000 to 4,000 per daughter!! As a result, I have begun to ponder texting and text messaging, instant messaging and social networking (i.e., Facebook) and its effect on interpersonal skills and meaningful conversation. After a recent article in the Wall Street Journal about texting and multiple conversations, it appears that I am not alone in my fears.The article included an anecdotal story about a 17 year old High School student who was caught text messaging in class and was therefore sent to the vice-principal’s office. As the Vice-Principal was reprimanding the student about how he needed to focus on his teachers and not texting on his cell phone, he noticed the student’s fingers moving on his lap. The student was texting while being reprimanded for texting! Young people today, including my daughters, are in the constant state of socialization, either by cell phone, instant messaging or social networking. My daughters can do all three of these while doing homework! However, this raises an important question for this networking generation: can we have meaningful conversation and dialogue if this generation is holding multiple conversations with friends via cell phone, texting and social networking web sites, sometimes simultaneously? This question has great implications as to how meaningful learning conversations can occur. The WSJ article asked a pertinent question: Are these hyper-socializers serial time wasters who will have poor face to face interpersonal skills? What effect, if any, will it have on Learning Conversations and the JLC conversational guidelines of: Listening for Understanding, Speaking from the Heart, Suspending Certainty, Holding Space for Difference and Slowing down the Inquiry? Ben Bajarin, a technology analyst at a consulting firm in California, argues that these multiple conversations actually strengthen social skills. He believes that the young generation“is good at managing conversations and getting to the pithy essence of an issue which will help them in the workplace.” Mr. Bajarin goes on to say that while older colleagues’ waste time holding meetings, young people can sum up things in one sentence text messages. He claims that these young people know how to optimize and prioritize and call or set up a meeting if needed; otherwise, they text. Holly Gallagher, a human resource manager, believes that as the young generation enters the workplace, management must adjust to the new ways they socialize and communicate. She believes that “young people today want accessibility. If they have a problem or suggestion they will email or text senior managers, or even the CEO. They don’t have the old school notion that there are appropriate communication models.” Past generations accepted the belief that corporations were hierarchical, and you only communicated with your immediate supervisor. However, today’s generation has grown up in a freedom of information era. Ms. Gallagher sees a positive in all of this. In many corporations, lack of quality conversation and communication can cause things to go wrong (see, 1-800-Mattres(s), Leave the Last ‘s’ off for Sayonara article in the August, 2009 JLC newsletter Click Here to read). However, she states that “in a lot of corporations, if something goes wrong, it’s because so-and-so did not talk to so-and-so. But with young people, simultaneous conversations are always happening. This reduces the chances of not reaching success because the right people did not connect.” Well, there it is. A different perspective on what the future of communication and meaningful conversation might look like. The speed and ease of communication can cut both ways. While making communication more frequent, it can also be less personal and intimate. Maybe the future will hold different methods and forms of communication and meaningful conversation. However, from my perspective, the JLC Learning Conversation Guidelines will always be important elements for meaningful and successful conversation. It is up to educators, employers and families to continue the quest for the ultimate goal of meaningful and Learning Conversations. Quality conversations, regardless of the method, develop quality relationships. When we have quality conversations using the JLC Learning Conversation Guidelines, we develop common understanding among all participants, enhance the quality of the relationship, and allow for decision making that will be of value to all involved, regardless of the method of communication. |
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